Just Emil — a “now” page, because “about me” is boring
Updated 31st October from Playa del Carmen, Mexico
This is a now page inspired by the project by Derek Sivers. It’s like an ‘about me’ but less boring ;)
Hi, my name is Emil. Here is what I’m up to right now.
What I’m thinking about right now
If life were a game, how would you win?
If I don’t have stimulants (or external validation/insecurity) driving me forward, what is my motivation to do anything?
Can I create a life where I don’t feel the need to procrastinate or gravitate towards cheap dopamine?
Firstly, I’m figuring out what to do with my life.
After a lifetime as a medical doctor and then another lifetime as a digital nomad and entrepreneur, I am going all in on writing.
And, after being “Dr. Emil”, “entrepreneur Emil” or “Emil the bodybuilder ” I figured I would shed the labels and go with Just Emil for the ongoing evolution and exploration of what I am thinking about.
This is currently manifesting as a newsletter and my daily(ish) writing here on Medium.
I am partially doing this to refine and level up my thinking in my search for alignment.
And I am partially exploring how to live life to the fullest by asking the question: “If life were a game, how would you win?”
Clearly, these two are related but after ‘winning’ many times over in my previous lives by any normal measure, I am finding that I am having to go deeper into the human psyche, exploring paths that don’t appear to be that well traveled.
Oh, and I gave up caffeine
Related to this, I gave up caffeine on the 21st of September and declared war on cheap dopamine at the start of October (though I’ve already stumbled… hard).
These are topics that I will be writing more about in the future but in a super brief summary:
Caffeine
I found after giving up caffeine that I had a significantly decreased tolerance for doing things that I am indifferent to. A terrifying prospect when I reflect on how much of my life I’ve spent forcing myself to do things that I later found to be out of alignment or that were done for the wrong reasons.
The question is, without stimulants (or the insecurities of my younger self) to drive me forward, what do I actually want to do with my life?
Cheap dopamine
Related to this, like most people, I find myself erring towards cheap and easy dopamine regularly throughout my life whether this is in the form of a tub of ice cream when sad or watching Youtube when I’m supposed to be working.
Forcing myself to go cold turkey from cheap dopamine is one approach, but I wonder whether I can create a life where I don’t feel the need to procrastinate and don’t reach for cheap dopamine. Is this even possible?
What I’m Writing About?
As well as the more abstract concepts of alignment and the game of life, I write about health, wealth (freedom and money), and relationships.
I think of these as the ‘mini-games’ of life. They can be fun to play and they confer benefits to the greater game but they can also be distractions from fulfilment and take away from happiness.
I am currently writing very broadly both to explore what people are interested in and also to see what I am interested in. If I don’t enjoy the process it is not worth it for me.
Finally, my last few years in tattoos
Something interesting about me that will also find its way into my writing.
Over the past 3 years, I’ve set an annual intention.
2021 was ‘Acceptance of Suffering’ both in life and in particular that pain which is an inextricable part of growth. This became the first red band.
2022 was ‘Effortless Flow’ which centered around detaching from outcomes and not trying to control the uncontrollable. This was the turquoise band.
2023 was ‘Simple Alignment’ and signified my pursuit of Alignment and living in integrity with my true self above all else. This was the final purple band.
Each was set at the start of the year and then evolved as I lived life, reflected, and iterated and once I had embodied it sufficiently I got the tattoo to remind me of what I had learned and ideally prevent me from forgetting what was so hard-won.
As this is a ‘now’ page, I will try to keep this up-to-date as things develop and change.
